This is the first time I have read a description of “dead calm.”
I don’t get really angry very often but when I do I am “dead calm.” I feel cold and my bp lowers. It lasts for as long as the “threat” remains unresolved.
Hi Star I just came across this book that might be useful to you or some of the readers of this particular column. A new book — perhaps another input for your/our thinking.
Abrazos, Kathy
Reframing Trauma Through Social Justice
Resisting the Politics of Mainstream Trauma Discourse
"Feminist separatist" is not an accurate term and is used as a slur. Even the very few rural, female-only communities deal w/ male neighbors, vendors, repair crews, mixed community events, family members, etc. The majority of women who ask for (but don't get) no naked penises in girls'/women's showers & changing rooms are not feminists and don't want to go live in women-only communities! The "bitter anger" you state exists between trans activists and some females, the majority whom are not feminists, is extremely one-sided. So far, there are no known instances of women punching, kicking, hitting, spitting on, throwing objects at, or pouring liquids on trans activists,; making bomb threats; threatening them with torture, murder and dismemberment,; harassing them in person or on line; sexually harassing them w/ pornographic images; shouting dehumanizing, sexualized language at them en masse; trying to get them fired from their jobs or means of making a living, or advocating for others do do these things. Trans activists are doing all of the above, regularly--I have news reports, dates, names, events, court outcomes and details of many. It's not just a few bad actors; it's a war on females who disagree with them. They never criticize right wing males for beating and killing them, however.
Extremely helpful chapter. Thank you! Caution about "trauma" therapists. Trauma certification can be for only 12 hour on-line course to university course for credit including clinical supervision. Guess which kind most therapists get? Because they have to promote themselves online, even if they work for an agency, too many claim trauma competency. Too many carelessly re-injure people. Too many use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to deliberately invalidate trauma clients' experiences by claiming all we need to do is change our "perception" of traumatic events to match theirs, which is that we're imagining our trauma or even the event(s). Best to get personal recommendation from another trauma survivor who was treated competently & compassionately by a particular therapist. Love the parts about healing w/ friends & community.
As someone who has experienced real trauma and has been suffering from deeply disabling layer upon layer of PTSD for over a decade, most of it unconsciously and undiagnosed until a recent retriggering event, I really appreciate your insights. This post deserves to be shared widely! It explains so much about everything from police/military violence to the current US regime's cruel budget bill. I am especially grateful for your point about the value of just listening instead of trying to fix the person. I know it's hard for friends and community to stop their urge to give advice and do something when witnessing PTSD from the outside, but so often, that is exactly what is needed. Along with a bowl of soup or a shared walk in nature. Just letting the person know that they are not alone and that they are more than their PTSD. Thank you for this.
Really appreciating this series (the overall thread, and this double-click into Agency and its relationship to trauma). I recently explored a similar topic through a slightly different lens that I see in relationship with what you're saying here; sharing here in case others may find it useful:
Thanks, Brian! I also appreciate your work, and just restacked the post above which is a perfect complement to mine! Now you've give me even more to read! I've also been a longtime fan of Wineman's work on Power-Under.
I take issue with some of the ways you describe the impact of trauma. Perhaps I have experienced different kinds of trauma than what you are discussing. Or perhaps there are other impacts and responses to trauma you have not included. For example, I worked for 4.5 years in the West Bank and Gaza and health and humanitarian assistance programs. Every time I left Jerusalem I felt like I was entering a concentration camp. I felt horrified, nauseated, overwhelmed, terribly concerned for all the pain I saw. I was very aware that the health and humanitarian programs were doing so little for so few in a completely horrifying situation. But I didn't feel ashamed or that my own feeling of self-worth or agency were negatively affected. I was an outsider doing whatever I could to help make things better in a situation where everything just got worse. So the horrors I saw daily were traumatizing but not exactly in the way you are describing in your article. On the other hand, much of what you say about post-trauma and recovery describe perfectly my own experience once I left that assignment.
It sounds like you were doing helpful work, so that you always had a sense of agency. Like the activists I met there, who never for a moment believed they could solve all the problems of Gaza even 20 years ago, but felt strong and empowered as long as they could do something! Not everyone responds to trauma in the same way--and not everyone comes out of even a traumatizing situation with post traumatic stress, let alone PTSD. Thanks for the work you've done.
This is the first time I have read a description of “dead calm.”
I don’t get really angry very often but when I do I am “dead calm.” I feel cold and my bp lowers. It lasts for as long as the “threat” remains unresolved.
Thank you Starhawk. When the book is published it sounds to be a go to for many different reasons. Antiga would be proud
This is such a wise, kind and helpful overview of trauma, trauma responses and healing from trauma. I will share widely
Hi Star I just came across this book that might be useful to you or some of the readers of this particular column. A new book — perhaps another input for your/our thinking.
Abrazos, Kathy
Reframing Trauma Through Social Justice
Resisting the Politics of Mainstream Trauma Discourse
Edited By Catrina Brown
Copyright 2024
"Feminist separatist" is not an accurate term and is used as a slur. Even the very few rural, female-only communities deal w/ male neighbors, vendors, repair crews, mixed community events, family members, etc. The majority of women who ask for (but don't get) no naked penises in girls'/women's showers & changing rooms are not feminists and don't want to go live in women-only communities! The "bitter anger" you state exists between trans activists and some females, the majority whom are not feminists, is extremely one-sided. So far, there are no known instances of women punching, kicking, hitting, spitting on, throwing objects at, or pouring liquids on trans activists,; making bomb threats; threatening them with torture, murder and dismemberment,; harassing them in person or on line; sexually harassing them w/ pornographic images; shouting dehumanizing, sexualized language at them en masse; trying to get them fired from their jobs or means of making a living, or advocating for others do do these things. Trans activists are doing all of the above, regularly--I have news reports, dates, names, events, court outcomes and details of many. It's not just a few bad actors; it's a war on females who disagree with them. They never criticize right wing males for beating and killing them, however.
Extremely helpful chapter. Thank you! Caution about "trauma" therapists. Trauma certification can be for only 12 hour on-line course to university course for credit including clinical supervision. Guess which kind most therapists get? Because they have to promote themselves online, even if they work for an agency, too many claim trauma competency. Too many carelessly re-injure people. Too many use Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to deliberately invalidate trauma clients' experiences by claiming all we need to do is change our "perception" of traumatic events to match theirs, which is that we're imagining our trauma or even the event(s). Best to get personal recommendation from another trauma survivor who was treated competently & compassionately by a particular therapist. Love the parts about healing w/ friends & community.
As someone who has experienced real trauma and has been suffering from deeply disabling layer upon layer of PTSD for over a decade, most of it unconsciously and undiagnosed until a recent retriggering event, I really appreciate your insights. This post deserves to be shared widely! It explains so much about everything from police/military violence to the current US regime's cruel budget bill. I am especially grateful for your point about the value of just listening instead of trying to fix the person. I know it's hard for friends and community to stop their urge to give advice and do something when witnessing PTSD from the outside, but so often, that is exactly what is needed. Along with a bowl of soup or a shared walk in nature. Just letting the person know that they are not alone and that they are more than their PTSD. Thank you for this.
no george 😢
Really appreciating this series (the overall thread, and this double-click into Agency and its relationship to trauma). I recently explored a similar topic through a slightly different lens that I see in relationship with what you're saying here; sharing here in case others may find it useful:
https://citizenstout.substack.com/p/victimhood-and-the-allure-of-power
Thanks, Brian! I also appreciate your work, and just restacked the post above which is a perfect complement to mine! Now you've give me even more to read! I've also been a longtime fan of Wineman's work on Power-Under.
I take issue with some of the ways you describe the impact of trauma. Perhaps I have experienced different kinds of trauma than what you are discussing. Or perhaps there are other impacts and responses to trauma you have not included. For example, I worked for 4.5 years in the West Bank and Gaza and health and humanitarian assistance programs. Every time I left Jerusalem I felt like I was entering a concentration camp. I felt horrified, nauseated, overwhelmed, terribly concerned for all the pain I saw. I was very aware that the health and humanitarian programs were doing so little for so few in a completely horrifying situation. But I didn't feel ashamed or that my own feeling of self-worth or agency were negatively affected. I was an outsider doing whatever I could to help make things better in a situation where everything just got worse. So the horrors I saw daily were traumatizing but not exactly in the way you are describing in your article. On the other hand, much of what you say about post-trauma and recovery describe perfectly my own experience once I left that assignment.
It sounds like you were doing helpful work, so that you always had a sense of agency. Like the activists I met there, who never for a moment believed they could solve all the problems of Gaza even 20 years ago, but felt strong and empowered as long as they could do something! Not everyone responds to trauma in the same way--and not everyone comes out of even a traumatizing situation with post traumatic stress, let alone PTSD. Thanks for the work you've done.